Nothing Braver THan Honesty
by Eve Daughter of Darkness
Summary: Will Relena finally get over Heero, or will Heero atually appear?


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Disclaimer: Um… no I don't own Gundam Wing… I thought that was obvious enough. 

AN: er… I'm sorry if you're reading this… this is one of those things that just came as a good idea, but didn't end so well… well, enjoy! And please review. 

"And as it seems, the Mars…" the President seem to drone on and on and on. Actually, usually Relena would be very interested in what the President has to say, but for some reason. She just can't relax today. Actually she was lying again, she knows why she's not concentrating. It was because today was Christmas Day. This day last year almost started another war. It was this day last year; Mariemaia appeared in their lives. 'You know there is another reason, Relena' that annoying pesky voice called again. Heero. Heero left on this day, exactly a year ago. He just simply…walked away. As if there's no one left he'd care for. There have been me. He could've cared for me.

"Well, to conclude this, I would like to wish everyone Merry Christmas and a happy New Year," the President smiled as everyone started to file out of the conference room and hurry to home to their family and loved ones. Relena too hurried home but to only family and friends knowing full well that her loved one, would not appear to celebrate this time of cheer and happiness. And mistletoe.

"As she walked outside, her limo along with Pagan awaited her. As she walked down the stairs from the great President's building, she decided to walk he way home. The weather was lovely. Everything was covered with blankets of snow. It looked like a beautiful painting. All it's missing is a couple sitting over there by the bench. 

No! Stop torturing yourself Relena. He's not going to be here. Period. You can live without him. You can, and you will.

She walked down the path to see a couple snuggling against each other. Underneath her breath she muttered, "Get a room, God! I hate public affections. You can to share your feeling, share it with a double bolted steel door separating you two from the rest of the world. Please." She stopped in her track. What was she talking about; she used to like to see couples, random couples, out on the street. It shows that the world still has some kind of humanity left. She continued to walk down the road a little more, tucking her coat more tightly around her thin frame. 

After a while, she decided that she felt tired so she found a bench and just decided to rest for a while. But soon enough, she surrendered to slumber.

She was sleeping on a bench. It was snowing again. Snowflakes came down on her. Her coat, her pants, her hair, her cheeks. Then, a figure came. The figure sat next to her, gently sweeping the snow off her. His warmth got to her. She opened her eyes. As soon as they're focused, came into view was Heero."Heero!" He smiled, something he rarely does. He learned closer, their lips came closer and closer…

With a jolt Relena woke up. Savoring what was her dream. She licked her lips. She found none of the warmth, only the salty taste of melted snow. _Stop thinking about Heero! He's not coming back. He's not. He's not. He's not…_

_ _

"_'Tis the season to be jolly…"_ Relena walked down the street even faster.It was cold, but it wasn't the cold that motivated her to walk home so fast, it was the thought of the tranquility of her room.Without a thought in the world, she would just lie there and read.

Relena finally reached her house. She hesitated for a second, disillusioned herself, thinking that maybe, just maybe Heero's back, and is waiting for her right behind the door. Waiting for her. Excited, she opened the door with great expectation. 

Disappointment. "Good afternoon Miss Relena." Pagan welcomed her. _No Heero... Of course Heero's not here, did you really believe he would be?_

_ _

She muttered a good after to Pagan, and hurried to her room, leaving two confused Zechs and Noin. They looked at each other, searching for an answer, "Tough day?"

At the entrance to her room, she took care not to look inside. Maybe, just maybe, Heero's in there because he didn't want anyone to know he came back. _Sigh. _She walked in, nothing. No one was in her room. It was just her room, with her bed neatly made, her clean dresser. She walked over to the makeup dresser, took off the band that was confining her hair. She shook it wildly, releasing it from its entrapment. She looked into the mirror; a wildly haired blonde was staring at her. _Is that I? Is it I who is in that mirror. Is this how Heero sees me…? Stop it! Stop thinking about _him_ he's never coming back, might as well forget him now. _

She jumped backwards onto her bed. She stared at the ceiling looking for something, nothing. It was blank. She felt tears swelling up in her eyes. _I'm so pathetic… I can't believe here I am; the Foreign Minister, yet I have a crush like a blabbering teenager. But I am a teenager. I'm only 17._

_ _

A song came into her head, and she started singing, her voice quivering a bit. 

If I let go of your hand clasped in mine,

With that, I would all probably come to an end right now.

_  
_What I wanted to know, and even what hurts me-

Even those went left undone.

Even though I should want to wish for you to find happiness,

I can't, I'm too immature.

I wipe the tears, but they still keep flowing.

Sayonara.

I love you

More than anyone else.

Even more deeply than the sky. __

_ _

Don't cry.

We'll meet again, right?

But not being able to see you

Is something that only I know about. 

This fate that we've chosen..

Someday you too will understand its true meaning.

The treasure of memories that we've made

Will always live on deep inside my heart

I thought it was a beautiful thing,

The word called hope.

In an almost painful embrace,

I'm looking up at you.

Arigatou

I love you

More than anyone else.

Even more strongly than dreams.

Hold me.

Don't' let go.

But don't utter

Even a single thing…

Don't cry.

I love you.

Even though we're separated far apart,

I can still live with you.

I hate this song. I hate Heero… I hate myself… oh my God… he's never coming back is he? Never…

With that she burst into tears. Letting out all the anger and hurt bottled up for so long. She has finally realized the truth. 

_ _

Nothing braver than honesty. 

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